As far as magicians go there is a huge difference between the professional and amateur: the professional magician earns a living from magic and therefore will take pride in working on his performance, technique, presentation, showmanship, misdirection and social skills in order to entertain and mystify. The amateur however is normally a bloke who has learnt a couple of tricks from the back of a cereal box and he is happy to be out of his house and away from his nagging wife; he doesn’t care what he is paid and in some cases he will work for free. The amateur will also walk around eating crisps very loudly and is likely to be drunk. Modern professionals are currently developing a kind of gun that shoots claw bearing kittens ‘pump-action’ style at the amateur which can be operated by any client fearing the structural integrity of their event.